Two weeks ago today, I felt the most excruciating pain of my life. Today, though still tired and feeling the pins-and-needles sensation, I am making progress and have no unexplainable pain.
Two weeks ago feels like a lifetime ago.
With the progress I’m making, I still have so many questions about my future journey. Why this happened will never leave my mind. But other things like, will the numbness always be there? Will I be able to drive? When will I be able to care for my daughter properly? Does this condition affect my having children in the distant future? How long will I be “in recovery?”
So many questions running through my mind.
This condition is so rare, and besides researching what exactly it is, it’s hard to find specific success stories related to CES. For a person that craves instant satisfaction in a world where this is normally easily achieved, it can be frustrating. But I stay hopeful and continue to hunt down answers.
This syndrome isn’t stopping my life, and it requires me to modify things. I am adjusting to how I view myself in this whole scenario, rather than how others view me. For the majority of my life, I cared too much what others thought. Not anymore.
I went into my real estate office yesterday for a sales meeting and was initially nervous about going in, fearing what people would think of me, what’s been going on, and more importantly, seeing me with a walker.
But I put that fear aside and when in. My office is filled with some truly wonderful and caring people, some of which have known me since I was 16. None judged and all were happy to see me. Sitting in on the sales meeting also ignited my passion to stick to my goal of working the business hard in 2015. Even if I need to modify certain ways of working, I am dedicated to this goal.
Maybe this happened to me to help pull out the person I know I can be — a confident, strong individual that is dedicated to her family and will stop at nothing to make her dreams come true. There was a period of my life it seemed as though that person was slipping away. I am making progress on getting her back, and will not let anything stop me.